Communication

TODAY I WILL BE TALKING ABOUT COMMUNICATION AND MUTAUL PROBLEM SOLVING. THE WAY WE TALK AND CONVERSATE WITH FRIENDS, SPOUSES AND FAMILY IT IS VERY IMPORTANT TO BE UNDERSTOOD. COMMUNICATION SKILLS ARE BEING ABLE TO CONVERSATE EFFECTIVELY IS PERHAPS THE MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL LIKE SKILL IN MY OPINION. COMMUNICATION ENABLES US TO PASS INFORMATION AN THOUGHTS OR CONCLUSION AND THEORIES TO OTHER PEOPLE AROUND US. TOAYS WORLD ARE AREN'T REALLY SURE HOW COMMUNICATION WORKS IN MANY WAYS JUST NOT VERBALLY TALKING COMMUNICATION INVOLVES BODY LANGUAGE AN FACAIL EXPRESSIONS AS WELL. ALSO THE PITCH OF VOICE, TONE IT AND SOFT SKILLS.ANOTHER KEY TO BECOME A VAILD COMMUNICATOR IS TO BECOME A GREAT LISTENER. BEING AN ACTIVE LISTENER AND PAYING CLOSE ATTENTION . ALSO YOU ARE CLARIFYING THE AMBIGUTIES ARE ALSO KEY BECAUSE YOU SEE THE OTHER PERSON POINT OF VIEW OF THE TOPIC OF THE CONVERSATION OR FEELING. ALSO LISTING IS VERY FAIR BECAUSE WHEN BOTH TALK ABOUT THEIR FEELINGS TOWARDS SOMETHING YOU WANT THEM TO HEAR YOU SO WHY NOT HEAR THEM SO THINGS CAN BE UNDERSTOOD AND NOT ASSUMED A MISCONCEIVED. WITHOUT LISTENING WE DON’T HEAR ANYTHING SO THERE FOR WE ASSUME WHAT MIGHT BE SAID OR WAS. HOWEVER I JUST SHARED THE MOST TWO IMPORTANT THINGS THAT HELP ME BECOME A BETTER COMMUNICATOR, ALSO UNDERSTANDING WHY IT WAS IMPORTANT THEN AND STILL IMPORTANT NOW. WITHOUT SHARING YOUR INSIGHT AN FEELING NOBODY WILL NEVER KNOW HOW YOU FEEL OR EITHER UNDERSTAND WHAT YOUR FEELING. AN HOW SMEONE IS GOING TO LISTEN IF YOU DON’T SAY WORDS SO HOW DOES THAT WORK IF YOU KNOW HOW LET ME KNOW IM LISTENING. I FOUND IT BETTER TO COMMUNICATE WITH PEOPLE NO MATTER WHAT BECAUE EVERYONE HAVE SOMETHING OFFER IN A POSITIVE WAY.I BECAME A BETTER LISTENER BY KNOWING WHAT IM RESPONDING TO OR HOW THE OTHER PERSON FEELING. NOW I WILL SWITCH GEARS A BIT TO TOUCH UP ON MUTAUL PROBLEM SOLVING WHICH CONNECT WITH COMMUNICATION. IF WE COMMUNICATE AN GET AN UNDERSTANDING WHY DID THE PROBLEM BECOME A PROBLEM INSTEAD OF A SITUATION. WE OFTEN SOMETIMES JUST SEEK OUR POINT OF VIEW WITH MANY SITUATION, SUCH AS WHY MEN SHOULDN’T HAVE FEMALES FRIENDS WHEN IN A RELATIONSHIP OR MARRIAGE. WELL I MIGHT HAVE A DIFFERENT THOUGHT ABOUT THAT AND MY GIRLFRIENDS MIGHT HAD A DIFFERENT THOUGHT ABOUT THAT AS WELL. THAT’S DOSENT MEAN WE DON’T HAVE TO CREATE THAT INTO A FUSS OR A PROBLEM THETY WAY WE CAN SOLVE THAT IS JUST NECESSARILY CONVERSATE ABOUT THE PROS AN CONS AN COME TO A MUTUAL AGREEMENT AN NOT JUST ONE SIDED BECAUSE THAT’S CREATE CONFUSION. I BELIVE THAT’S WHY A LOT OF COUPLES FALL INTO THIS WHOLE OF POWER IN A RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE YOU HAVE THAT ONE TIME THEY MAKE THE DECISION AN YOU GO ALONG WITH IT TO AVOID CONFLICT OR SO FORTH SO THATS WHEN THEY GET AHEAD OF THEMSELVES IM TALKING IN THIRD PERSON BECAUSE IT HAPPENED TO ME. MUTAUL PROBLEM SOLVING IS STRATEGY OF DOING WHATS BEST FOR YOU BOTH INSTEAD OF JUST ONE BECAUSE WE ALL HAVE FEELINGS ABOT THINGS THAT DOSENT GO OUR WAY AT SOME POINT BUT WHEN WE TALK IT OUT AN UNDERSTAND WHAT EACH OTHER IS SAYING OR FEEL ABOUT IT IS A BETTER UNDERSTANDING OVERALL. ASLO WE SHOULD KEEP IN MND THAT DON’T BE THE PROBLEM TO PROBLEM BECAUSE IF SO, IT WILL NEVER GET SOLVED. ALSO RESPECT OTHERS THOUGHTS IN A MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP ETC. IT IS IMPORTANT BECAUSE WHEN WE COMMUNICATION ABOUT OUR THOUGHTS THAT YOU MIGHT NOT UNDERSTAND WE LISTING MORE TO UNDERSTAND AN AFTER THAT YOU COME TO A MUTAUL AGREEMENT TO SOLVE A SO CALLED PROBLEM OR DISAGREEMENT. THANK YOU ENJOY VONNY 

Family Stress

WHAT A GREAT DAY TO BE ALIVE. IM EXCITED TO TALK ABOUT THIS TOPIC FAMILY STRESS. FAMILY STRESS CAN BE CREATED IN MAY DIFFERENT WAYS.SUCH AS NOT KNOWING WHAT TO DO WHEN UPCOMING PROBLEMS SUCH AS MONEY, WORK, ISSUE WITH FAMILY AND RELATIONSHIP WITH SIBLINGS.ONCE UPON A TIME I HAVED EXPERIENCE FAMILY STRESS FAMILY ASKING FOE MONEY. HOWEVER KNOWING IM A COLLEGE STUDENT THEY ASKED FOR LARGE AMOUNT OF MONEY AND IT PUT ME UNDER STRESS NOT KNOWING HOW TO MOVE FORWARD WITH IT. THAT’S AN EXPERIENCE THAT CAN MAKE YOU HAVE MIXED FEELINGS BECAUSE YOU WOULD WANT TO HELP THEM BUT DO YOU HAVE IT TO HELP. NOW YOUR IN THIS POSITION WHERE YOU HAVE TO EXPLAIN TO THEM HOW YOU CANT HELP. YOU LOVE OTHERS AN WANT TO DO ANYTHING TO PUTN THEM IN A GREAT POSITION NO MATTER WHAT. WELL I HAD TO KEEP IN MIND THE TYPE OF PEOPLE THEY WAS KNOWING THAT THEIR REACTION MIGHT NOT BE WHAT YOU EXPECT OR DO BUT EITHER WAY WE SHOULD GO WITH OUR MOVE. WHAT IM EXPLAINING IS THAT IT CREATES A TOUGH SITUATION AN IT CREATES STRESS TOWARDS ONE ANOTHER WITHIN A COUPLE FAMILY OR ETC. ALSO WHAT CAN CREATE FAMILY STRESS IS TOO MUCH TO DO IN A VERY SHORT PERIOD OF TIME. HAVE ANOTHER EXPERIENCE. AROUND LAST YEAR OF 2019 AROUND CHRISTMAS TIME MY MOM HAD PLANNED TO GO TO A BABY SHOWER TO ATTEND ON SATURDAY. I WAS SUPPOSE TO PICKED UP FROM.THE AIRPORT THAT SUNDAY AND MY SISTER HAD A DOCTORS APPOINTMENT THAT MONDAY AN MY DAD HAD TO WORK EVERYDAY AT 5 AM TO 12 AM AN THE AIRPORT WAS A WHILE AWAY. SO THIS AT LEAST A WEEK BEFORE AN NOT TO MENTION MY FLIGHT WAS CHANGED INTO MONDAY THE TIME OF MY SISTER DOCTORS APPOINTMENT. SO THERE IS THIS FAMILY STRESS NOW MOM HAD A SCHEDULE TO GO BY. ALSO MY SIBLINGS AREN'T IN SCHOOL THERE IS ON CHRISTMAS BREAK AN MY MOM STILL WORKS ONLINE AS TEACHER AN DOING A BUNCH OF GRADING SHE SCHEDULED TO DO. HOWEVER THEY WAS STRESSED OUT BECAUSE IT WAS A LATE NOTICE AN MY GRANDPARENTS WAS NOT OPEN TO WATCH THEM BECAUSE THEY WORKED THEMSELVES. ITS MORE TO THE STORY BUT THAT’S THE POINT OF FAMILY STRESS WHEN YOUR PLANS GETTING INTERFERED WITH OTHERS OR DELAYS ANN YOUR PLANS DON’T GO AS PLANNED BECAUSE OTHERS THINGS COME UP.IT CAN TAKE A TOLL ON OTHER MEMBERS OF THE FAMILY AN EVERYONE PANIC AN BE DISCOURAGED.MANY EXPERIENCES IN LIFE HAVE TAUGHT THAT FAMILY STRESS WILL MAKE LIFE MOPPY AN MISERABLE BECAUSE THEY NOT ABLE TO ENJOY THE THING THEY HAD PLANNED. BECAUSE DISTRACTED BY OTHER SITUATIONS IN LIFE OR UPCOMING AN SEEKING HOW TO MAKE A DECISION THAT WILL BENEFIT YOU AN YOUR FAMILY WHAT WILL BWE UNDERSTOOD WHY AN WILL NOT CREATE PROBLEMS WITHIN THE FAMILY. THERE IS ANOTHER THING WERE FAMILY STRESS IS CREATED WHEN OUR PEERS HAVE DEPRESSION AN WE DON’T KNOWING HOW TO COPE WITH THAT AN SEEK TO BE HAPPY DESPITE THE PROBLEM. THAT CAN BE UPSETTING BECAUSE WHAT MAKE THEM HAPPY MIGHT NOT MAKE US HAPPY AT THE TIME. MAKING BAD DECISIONS CAN CREATE FAMILY STRESS HOW THEY LOOKED AT AN HOW THEY CAN OVERCOME THAT DECISION AN HOW IT HAS EFFECTED THEM AS WHOLE AN THE WORRY ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF THEM AN HOW WILL THEY BE ABLEW TO LIVE WITHOUT BEING TOUCHED OR  LOOKED AT BECAUSE OF THAT MISTAKE OR DECISION. FAMILY STRESS CAN BE UNEXPECTED TIMES AN MY ADVICE TO THE ONES THAT SEE THIS IS THAT JUST DO THE BEST YOU CAN NEVER GIVE UP TOUGH TIKMES DON’T LAST LONG.

Respecting One Another

THIS WEEK DISCUSSION TOPICS ARE SEXAUL INTIMACY AN FAMILY LIFE.

I WOULD LIKE TO START OFF BY SAYING THAT IT IS DIFFICULT TO ADAPT TO

MANY SITUATION.SUCH AS MARRIAGE AN NOT HAVING INTERCOURSE EVERYDAY

OR AS OFTEN AS YOU WOULD LIKE TO. HOWEVER THAT’S WHAT WE HAVE

EXPERIENCED NOT OUR SPOUSE OR OUR GIRLFRIEND OR SOON TO BE SPOUSE

THEREFORE I BELIEVE WE SHOULD RECOMMEND AN BE FAIR TO RESPECT THAT

WE ALL EXPERIENCE DIFFERENT UPBRINGING. SUCH AS ME BEING ACTIVE

SEXUALLY SINCE 12 YEARS OF AGE I SHOULDN’T GO INTO MY RELATIONSHIP

EXPECTING MY SIGNIFICANT OHERS TO BE ACTIVE OR WANTING TO BE

ACTIVE JUST BECAUSE OF ME. EVERYTHING IN LIFE WE SHOULD ADAPT TO AN

PUT THOUGHT TOO. TODAYS SOCIETY THE WORLD SEEKS TO PUT THAT

PRESSURE ON PEOPLE REGARDING SEXUALLY ACTIVE IN MARRIAGE MAKIG THAT

THE PINPOINT TO MAKE ONE ANOTHER HAPPY A HAVE A PEACEFULLY

MARRIAGE. ALSO READING BOOKS OR PODCAST OR SO FORTH THAT’S JUST

OTHERS EXPERIENCES AN THOUGHTS TO HELP OTHERS BUT THE WORDS ARE

REALLY OPTIONAL NOPE ITS VERY DEMANDING SO THEREFORE PEPLE TAKE THE

RISK TO FOLLOW THAT AN WHEN THEY FAIL THAT THEY SEEMS TO GET

DISCOURAGE OR SAY THAT THE ADVICE OR BOOK WAS GARBAGE. WELL I

SHOULD SAY WHAT WORKS FOR SOME DOSENT WORK FOR ALL.NOW I WILL

SWITCH IT UP NOW AS A MEMBER IT MAY SEEM VERY DIFFICULT TO LISTEN TO

OTHERS OUTSIDE YOUR FAITH BECAUSE THEY DON’T FOLLOW THE SAME

PEOPLE SUCH AS ROLE MODELS ALSO PEOPLE THAT ARE EXAMPLES TO THEM.

ALSO WE FOLLOW TE SCRIPTURES AN CONFERENCE TALKS ABOUT MANY

DIFFERENT TOPICS REGARDING MARRIAGE AN SO FORTH. WE SEEK TO DIFFER

FROM THE WORDLY LIFE AN WHAT IT HAS TO OFFER. ALSO IT CAN BE THE FACT

THAT YOU HAVEN'T LET O SOME OFF THOSE HABITS A EXPERIENCES WHICH

MAY CARRY OVER TO YOUR MARRIAGE OR RELATIONSHIP SO ITS NOT OURR

FAULT THAT WE EXPERIENCED THAT NEITHER SHOULD WE ALLOW ITBTO

OVERTAKE US WE SHOULD ALWAYS TRY TO DO OUR BEST TO RESPECT OUR

SPOUSE LOVE AN DIFFICULTIES REGARDING SEX AN UNDERSTAND HOW

FEMALES ACTUALLY ARE AN HOW THEY WANT TO HAVE COMFORT BEFORE

PHYSICAL TOUCHING. ANOTHER THING I WOULD LIKETO SHARE IS THAT

WOMAN NEED LOVE AN AFFECTION BEFORE DOING WHAT SOME OTHERS

FEMALE PROMOTES INTO THEIR OWN LIFES OR BUILT UP FEELINGS OR HABITS.

A LOT OF MEN SENSE TO USE THEIR PAST EXPERIENCES TO DEFINE WOMAN

WHEN THAT’S NOT THE CASE BECAUSE PEOPLE HAVE SO MUCH TO OFER IN

DIFFERENT WAYS 100 PEOPLE DO NOT SPEAK FOR 2 MILON OTHERS AROUND

THE WORLD.HOWEVER NOW I'LL WILL CONVERSATE ABOUT HOW WE SHOULD

TAKE OUR FAMILY ADVICE. I BELIEVE THAT FAMILY ADVUCE WE CAN

CONSIDER BUT DON’T ALLOW IT TO OVERTAKE US BECAUSE IT CAN. SUCH AS

SOMEONE ELSE OPTIONAL CAN OVERTAKE YOU INSTEAD OF JUST GIVING A

SUGGESTION WHICH IS A BETTER OFFER BCAUSE TELLING SOMONE EHAT THEY

HAVE TO DO WIL LEAVING THEM FEELING LIKE THEYB ARE HELD

ACCOUNTABLE SOMEWHAT AS AN EXPECTATION. WHEN HELD UP TO AN

EXPECTATION IT WILL KILL YOU OR MAKE YOU OVERWHELMED WHEN YOU

MAKE A MISTAKE OR DON’T LIVE UP TO THE STANDARD. I WOULD IKE TO SHARE

MY EXPERIENCE OF BEING SEXUALLY ACTIVE AT A YOUNG AGE HAS TAUGHT

ME THAT NOT BEING A MEMBER WHILE THOSE TIMES I DID THINGS DOSENT ME

AN OTHERS MY AGE ARE DOING THE SAME AN I SHOULDN'T LOOK UPON THEM

AS LAME OR I SHOULD MAKE THEM ADAPT TO WHAT I HAVE EXPERIENCED WE

SHOULD BE MUTAUL AS WE MAKE DECISION WITH OUR WIFE AN RESPECT

OTHERS FRO THEIR FEELINGS AN SO FORTH. THANK YOU.     

Marriage Transitions

MARRIAGE COMES WITH MANY DIFFERENT STAGES OF TRANSITION. EACH OF THE SPOUSES IS REQUIRED TO TAKE ON DIFFERENT ROLES AS THEIR LIVES CHANGE TOGETHER AND AS THESE COUPLES GO THROUGH THESE STAGES OF TRANSITION THEY WILL FIGURE OUT WHAT WORKS BEST FOR THEM AS A COUPLE. NOT ALL MARRIAGES HAVE THE SAME DYNAMICS AND SOMETIMES EACH MARRIAGE WILL HAVE DIFFERENT STAGES OF TRANSITION. IT IS VERY IMPORTANT IN THE FIRST STAGES OF RELATIONSHIPS AND MARRIAGE TO COMMUNICATE ONE ANOTHER'S FEELINGS TO EACH OTHER AS WELL AS TAKING INTO CONSIDERATION WHAT THEIR SPOUSE MAY BE GOING THROUGH OR BE HAVING DIFFICULTY WITH. IT IS ALSO IMPORTANT TO MAINTAIN THIS COMMUNICATION AND OPENNESS THROUGHOUT THE WHOLE MARRIAGE IN ORDER TO ENSURE THERE ARE NO WALLS BUILT IN THE RELATIONSHIP AND TO BE SURE THAT EACH PARTNER FEELS LOVED AND HEARD. WHEN IT IS JUST YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE BEFORE YOU HAVE CHILDREN, IT IS A LOT EASIER TO SETTLE DISAGREEMENTS AS WELL AS MAKE TIME FOR ONE ANOTHER AND KEEP OPEN COMMUNICATION BETWEEN ONE ANOTHER. ONCE CHILDREN ARE PUT INTO THE PICTURE, THERE ARE DEFINITELY A LOT MORE FACTORS THAT NEED TO BE CONSIDERED AND THIS CAN BE KNOWN TO CAUSE SOME TENSION IN RELATIONSHIPS. IN ORDER TO GET RID OF SOME OF THIS STREE AND TENSION COUPLES CAN CONSIDER SEEKING COUNSELING OR ADVICE FROM A TRUSTED FRIEND. MY ADVICE WOULD ALSO BE TO TAKE A STEP BACK AND REMEMBER THAT A CHILD IS A LOT OF RESPONSIBILITY FOR THE BOTH OF YOU AND THAT HAVING A CHILD WILL BE A HUGE ADJUSTMENT AND MAY TAKE SOME TIME TO GET USED TO. I CAN SAY THIS FROM EXPERIENCE, WHEN I HAD MY DAUGHTER THERE WERE A LOT MORE FACTORS TO PLACE INTO CONSIDERATION WITH MY RELATIONSHIP WITH HER MOTHER. WE FIGURED THINGS OUT AS TIME WENT ON, BUT I WISH I HAD THIS ADVICE BEFORE I HAD TO GO THROUGH THIS EXPERIENCE FOR MYSELF. AS CHILDREN START TO GROW OLDER THIS STARTS A NEW STAGE OF TRANSITION IN A MARRIAGE AND CAN EVEN START TO CHALLENGE THE RELATIONSHIP MORE THAN WHEN THE CHILD WAS EVEN SMALLER. THIS IS WHY COUPLES WILL HAVE TO ADAPT TO THIS NEW STAGE OF TRANSITION IN THEIR LIFE AND THEY CAN DO THIS BY WILLING TO BE OPEN TO CHANGE AND ADAPTING TO THE NEW THINGS THEIR CHILDREN MAY BE INTERESTED IN. IF THEY DO THIS THEY WILL HAVE AN EASIER TIME GETTING THROUGH THIS STAGE OF TRANSITION AND WILL NOT HAVE QUITE AS MANY DISAGREEMENTS. BEING ABLE TO OVER COME HARD THINGS AND STICK TOGETHER THROUGH THESE CHALLENGES IS ONE OF THE HARDEST PARTS OF A MARRIAGE AND IT IS WHATE DETERMINES WHETHER THE COUPLE IS STRONG ENOUGH TO GET THROUGH THESE TRIALS AND MAINTAIN A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP. THE LAST STAGE OF TRANSITION IN A MARRIAGE IS WHEN YOUR CHILDREN GROW UP AND MOVE OUT OF THE HOUSE, YOU ARE NOW EMPTY NESTORS. THIS STAGE SEEMS TO BE THE HARDEST, YET I WOULD NOT KNOW SINCE I HAVE YET TO EXPERIENCE IT MYSELF. I WOULD SAY THAT DURING THIS STAGE OF TRANSITION IT IS BEST FOR THE COUPLE TO TRY AND FIND NEW THINGS OF INTEREST FOR THEM TO PARTICIPATE IN AND MAKE SURE THEY ARE PAYING ATTENTION TO THEIR MENTAL HEALTH AS WELL AS THEIR SPOUSES. I BELIEVE IT IS ALSO IMPORTANT FOR COUPLES TO DO ACTIVITIES TOGETHER TO HELP THEM BOND AND BECOME CLOSER TO ONE ANOTHER AND CONTINUE TO GROW THEIR RELATIONSHIP AND MAINTAIN THE BOND BETWEEN ONE ANOTHER. IT IS ALSO IMPORTANT TO BE CONSIDERATE OF YOUR SPOUSE AND ANY HEALTH ISSUES THEY MAY BE GOING THROUGH AND BE SUPPORTIVE OF THEM DURING THESE TIMES. IT IS ALSO IMPORTANT TO STAY STRONG FOR ONE ANOTHER AND GIVE EACH OTHER THE LOVE YOU DESERVE AND NEVER LET THEM GO.